Fall into your garden

I approached my first year gar­den­ing as a sol­dier going into bat­tle. I pur­chased the nec­es­sary equip­ment. I made sure every­thing was in proper work­ing order. I did my own ver­sion of gar­den­ing cal­is­then­ics. Could I bend over? Could I squat? Did I mind hav­ing fin­ger­nails per­ma­nently stained with the earth?